Wednesday, November 2, 2011
I like to think that I am a lot like most other moms. Our primary objective in life is to care for our kids when they are with us, and to worry like crazy when they are not. As a working mother, I seem to have a LOT of time to sit here at the computer and worry. A concern that hits me like a ton of bricks every so often is; how can I be a good parent if I am gone for 9 or 10 hours of the day? Sometimes it feels like my kids are being raised by daycare and after-school programs. The life of a stay-at-home mom seems so much different than that of a full time working mom. I feel that I am missing out on so many things. I don’t sit and do art projects with my little ones, think up fun cupcake recipes or even get to volunteer at my daughter’s school. I hardly have the time to participate in a PTA fundraiser much less join up.
When I come home at night, Katelynn cries for me to come pick her up as if to say “just where in the hell have you been all day?” I try and catch up on what Alyssa did at school that day while inhaling something for dinner. Pretty soon bath time, then bed time, and I find myself wondering, where did the day go?
I think that being a mother comes with a certain amount of built-in guilt, no matter what your situation. If you are at home with the kids, you feel guilty for wanting to break away and do adult things, or maybe there is a certain amount of guilt for not bringing in a paycheck. If you are a working mother, you of course feel guilty for not being around enough.
I suppose what it comes down to, is that we all do our best to support our families and raise happy children. If that means being at home with the kids or going off to work every day to keep food on the table, we just do what we can. Maybe being a good mom for me doesn’t have to mean macaroni art, baked goods and PTA meetings. Maybe it means giving my children as much of my time as possible and using the rest to fill their tummies and give them a warm bed. What else can we do?
*Here are a couple from the archives. Alyssa was 3 here, goodness time flies.